The Perfect Dress -- Part Two

Due to the overwhelming response to the prior essay, I felt strongly that a follow-up was in order.

First, I’d like to thank all of you who came to my aid in my quest for The Perfect Dress.  I had no idea that so many astute shoppers and fashion influencers of a certain age were signed on to my blog.  And I was even more gratified to discover that you actually read what I write!

Shortly after posting my last essay, my mailbox became filled with recommendations for shops I hadn’t yet tried or heard of, and on-line fashion sites I should explore.  This was an eye-opener.  For someone who had considered herself a savvy shopper, I realized that I still had a lot to learn.

And second, kudos to the person who, despite my warning that the contents he was about to read would be unrelatable to his gender, proceeded anyway, and took the time to respond.  Again, I was gratified.  So, yes, Virginia, I do have male readers!  In fact, his email to me was so full of truth and good humor, it would be selfish of me not to share it with you.  So here it is.

“While I may be one of the few males who enjoys your blog, I totally understand because B has exactly the same problems.  So, I live with it.

"She is also looking…for the PERFECT hat.  The brim must be just right, not too big, a “small face” brim not covering her eyes.  And just the correct fit when she looks to the right.  Or the left.

"At that time, I either go and sit down in the store or go out to the car.  I do that because I know that we will have to stop at almost every rack to fondle the items on it.

"Then I know she will come out with nothing and ask me to take her somewhere else to start all over again.  This will continue until we have to go home and feed the dog.

"I don’t understand why we bought her a car just to sit in the driveway.  I’m sure her car would enjoy these shopping trips.

"I DO NOT!”

The male perspective made me smile for two reasons.  One, because it was funny, and true, and two, because it reminded me of something I heard a long time ago from Joy Behar when she was doing stand-up.  At the time she was between marriages and said her next perfect husband would be a man who would sit in a chair and hold her purse while she shopped at Loehmann’s.  (Damn, I miss Loehmann’s!)

So, thanks to your support and encouragement, I persevered.   And I’m pleased to report that I found it.  The Perfect Dress!

Of course, it was at the last place I thought to look.  A local fashion discount boutique whose clothes look great on French models, but not so terrific on those of us with Russian peasant ancestry.  Yet there it hung, a Boho Chic dress, my size, in all its unconstructed glory!

I rummaged in my purse for my list of requirements.

• Collar:  Not quite a 10 according to my no-collar rule, but acceptably small with a wide, flattering V neckline.
• Sleeves:  No problem!  Long sleeves that can easily be rolled up to elbow length.  Or not.
• Length:  Maxi
• Shape:  Loose but far from reminiscent of a circus tent.
• Frilly vs. Tailored:  A decisive absence of flounces, ruffles, and bows!
• Color:  Peacefully solid!  A soft orange somewhere between a cantaloupe and a creamsicle.  Definitely a personal favorite, both the color and the food items.
• Fabric:  Soft, cool, non-clingy.  Minimal wrinkle potential.
• Price tag:  Affordable!

I whisked it into the dressing room, convinced that all this perfection was too good to be true, and when I tried it on I would look like a giant carrot.  But no, if the mirror was accurate, I looked very much like a woman wearing The Perfect Dress!

P.S.  Want to know the best part? On sale – 50% off!

My perfect dress and I will be taking off the month of August.  So, watch this space for summer reruns.  See you in September with some fresh thoughts, and a new book!
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