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susan goldfein

Wonder Drugs

12/31/2020

0 Comments

 
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Hey, 2020.  Here’s your hat.  What’s your hurry?

I think the sentiment is universal.  Perhaps even interplanetary.  Most of us can’t wait for 2020 to be over.  I know I can’t.  What a year!  A devastating pandemic, a Presidential impeachment, Giuliani’s hair dye bomb, transition chaos, and a toilet paper shortage.  Can things get much worse?  Fortunately, the year is ending with some good news – a COVID vaccine and plenty of toilet paper.

But even as we were all social distancing, Big Pharma was busy once again, not just producing vaccine, but naming hundreds of recently released new drugs with high-scoring Scrabble letters.  Yes, those Scrabble players were at it again, this time tossing tiles in the air, and naming the new medications with a bumper crop of unpronounceable labels.  So here, for your final mental challenge of 2020, is the annual year-end Stupid Drug Names quiz.

Orladeyo
  1. A city in Florida
  2. Orla’s rendition of a Harry Belafonte hit
  3. A new cookie featuring two chocolate wafers with an orange marmalade filling
  4. A and B, and possibly C

Danyelza
  1. A bloke named Dan shouting out the first letter of the alphabet
  2. A new brand of sparkling water
  3. Azleynad spelled backwards
  4. None of the above

Imcivree
  1. An uninhabited island in Ireland just north of Innisfree
  2. Someone responding to the query “Who is Civree?”
  3. “No you’re not. I’m Civree!”
  4. All of the above.

Winlevi
  1. Part of an email address for Dolly’s sister, Winifred.
  2. A supermarket chain in Israel
  3. A chant shouted by Levi fans.
  4. Oh no, she’s at it again!

Monjuvi
  1. Original name of an 80’s rock band.
  2. A Frenchman claiming his Juvi
  3. A newly discovered Swiss Alp
  4. This is giving me a migraine.

 
Qinlock
  1. The letter “Q” trying something new.
  2. The heretofore unknown brother of a famous British detective
  3. What you use when you want to secure your Qin
  4. Is this almost over?

Xeglyze
  1. The process of decoding a Xeg
  2. The product of a chimpanzee with access to a key board
  3. If I could figure out how to pronounce it, I know I could come up with something clever
  4. None of the above

Gallium
  1. A very large bottle of tranquilizers
  2. Lium’s girlfriend
  3. The latest element on the Periodic Table
  4. All of the above.

Rukobia
  1. A new strain of measles
  2. A famous drag queen dressed up as a fish
  3. A fear of Ruks
  4. A, possibly C

Orgovyx
  1. A vapo-rub for an Orgo
  2. Vyxes having a night of debauchery
  3. Giving Vyx a choice to either stay……..
  4. Where’s the aspirin?

And the runner-ups include:  Klisyri, Oxlumo, Inmazeb, Evrysdi, and Uplizna

So how did you score? If you have any interest left at all, the real answers are below:

Orladeyo: treats angioedema; Danyelza: for neuroblastoma; Imcivree: control obesity; Winlevi: treat acne; Monjuvi: for lymphoma; Qinlock: treat gastrointestinal tumors; Xeglyze: treats head lice; Gallium: prostate cancer; Rukobia: HIV; Orgovyx: advanced prostate cancer.


Once again, from our house to yours, a very happy, healthy, and hopefully COVID-free New Year!  We are hunkering down tonight, and with some effort, we’ll make it to see the ball drop in Times Square, on TV of course!  And thank you for your readership and a year’s worth of lovely comments.  I couldn’t be having this much fun without you!
​

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    About the Author

    Susan is the author of two award-winning collections of humorous personal essays: “How Old Am I in Dog Years?” and “How to Complain When There’s Nothing to Complain About.”  Check out her Author Page HERE.

    Follow Susan on her web site:  www.SusansUnfilteredWit.com  
    Facebook:  www.facebook.com/UnfilteredWit/
    Twitter: https://twitter.com/UnfilteredWit 

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